5-20-09 Wednesday (Waitin’ Fer Government Cheese)

A day of natural beauty!  About an hour away from Bisbee, we went to the Kartchner Caverns.  They do an awesome job at preserving this live cave so no photography was permitted. They keep lint/dust down by misting the guests.  Lights inside the caverns were only on as they needed them.  The formations inside the cave were beautiful.  Web description excerpts: Experience a stunning limestone cave in Southeastern Arizona that boasts world-class features. This “live” cave, discovered in 1974, is host to a wide variety of unique minerals and formations. Water percolates from the surface and calcite formations continue to grow, including stalactites dripping down like icicles and giant stalagmites reaching up from the ground. Tour guides will unveil this fascinating underground landscape during a memorable 1½ hour tour. 

It wasn't until February 1978 that Tenen and Tufts told the property owners, James and Lois Kartchner, about their amazing discovery. During the four years of secret exploration, the discoverers realized that the cave's extraordinary variety of colors and formations must be preserved.

The cave's existence became public knowledge in 1988 when its purchase was approved as an Arizona State Park. Extraordinary precautions have been taken during its development to conserve the cave's near-pristine condition.

Pristine it is.  Our tour guide Joyce, was amazing.  She was full of knowledge and very up beat.  On a side note, she was wearing Z-Coil shoes.  I had a customer who wore these and said they were heaven.  Since my job was ending, there was no need to spend about $200 a pair on shoes.  Anyone seen these or have them?  Speak up! 

Since I couldn’t take photos in the cave, here’s some photos off the website.

 

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We saw this cookbook at the cave gift shop.  I thumbed through it and it looks like it takes some strange ingredients and makes meals out of them.  Maybe I’d make stuff from it, maybe not.  I just think it’s the perfect thing to have on hand.  I passed on it, maybe in the future we’ll pick one up.  A website excerpt:

• Kitty Chitwood's Slut Puppies—Deep-fried and delicious. And the leftovers can be spray-painted for darlin' Christmas tree ornaments later.
• Lois Bunch's Chili Con Queso—You don't have to make this with government cheese, but it sure tastes better if you do.
• Anita Biggon's El Diablo Dip-O—Do not try to operate heavy machinery after a few bites of this stuff!
• Sister Bertha's Old Rugged Cross Cake—The official cake of the First Baptist Church of Pangburn, Arkansas.
• Ruby Ann Boxcar's Fantastically Flawless Fantasy Fudge—Please don't send me letters tellin' me how good this is 'cause I already know.
• Juanita Hix's Sloppy Sloppy Joes—You might want to cover the table with a trash bag before eatin' these.

Yes, some ingredients were spam, government cheese, cocoa puffs, etc.  Hilarious and I’m sure edible and tasty too.

Above: Speaking of tasty… OK not really, but this was on the ground in the park.  It was about the size of a quarter and we think it is dead.  It was there before the tour and then after. 

Above: The display about the caverns/cave gave a model of what the discoverers had to crawl through and challenged visitors to see if they could fit.  Almost rude, and funny in a way…  Jim is off the hook, he fit fine.  Me?  Hell no, I ain’t tryin’ that shit.